Read before hitting the panic button or at least before hitting it another time, and again…
My husband and I have been in the process of an international adoption for over a year and a half. It has been an emotional roller-coaster of ups and downs, testing all the patience and yielding of control for this type A personality. Needless to say it has left me with sleepless nights wondering how this will ever turn out, the what if’s, the self-doubt and the burden of not having the solution.
Too often we put so much stress and pressure on ourselves to figure out lives problems, to have all of the right answers and to know which is the next step to take. Yesterday at Mass, I was reminded that the reality is much simpler if we allow it to be, God will sort it out. After all, He does have all the answers and I am daily reminded that I do not. Allowing God to be God and me just to be, while continually being open and receptive to the ways He is working in my life.
It was definitely a message I needed to hear, especially as we try to discern how God is calling us to build a family. There is something to be said about the peace and joy found when you free yourself from the pressure and burden of having to know it all.
In this place where I am right now, I just need to take one step at a time. I don’t need to know the exact timing or the way God will bless us with children. I don’t need to know what will happen with our current adoption process, all I need to know is God is God and I am not.
While I don’t know how the story will unfold or whether the adoption we have been muddling through will work out at all, I just need to remember not to panic.
So here’s to taking the week off from worrying and just giving it over, out of my court into His hands. It’s on Him, God can sort it out.